My time back in the States has proven to be emotionally stabilizing as it continues on. My first day back in the grind was very difficult. Each day has continually improved, with less feelings of utter dismay and disgust. I have found my mind and heart constantly wandering back to La Limonada. But, I have come the the conclusion that I am where I am right now, and that is where I am supposed to be for the time being. It may not be what I want, or think I want, but I am in this place for now. Discontent never does anyone any good, so I am keeping my life in as much perspective as possible. I am thanking God every day for his provision in my life, for his direction, that he is molding me into the person that he created me to be. I may not know who that person is yet, but he knows. He has always known. There is a tremendous comfort in that thought. It somehow makes all the things that don't make sense have some kind of purpose. Life oft seems like a maze, guessing at which way to take, making mistakes, having to turn around and try a different direction. But when we are playing follow the leader with God, he knows the way right through that maze. Sure, we may straggle off on our own sometimes and get stuck. But, as we grow, as we learn to trust, we will continually discover that God really does know the path that we are meant to take.
How incredible is that?
1 comments:
thank you for sharing your heart on this. Oh, we have SO much. we are SO blessed. It is FROM GOD when we see things as He sees them.
It reminds me of a term Kay Warren uses in her book Dangerous Surrender, that seeing all this suffering made her "Gloriously Ruined."
Enjoying your posts.
Darlene
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