After 5 years of suffering with shoulder pain and dealing with numbness in the last two fingers of my left hand, I finally caved last week and went to visit a chiropractor for the first time. Ever. Now, something that needs to be known about Bethany: she doesn't go to the doctor for pain unless something is hanging. By a thread. And even then its questionable if she'll make the trip.
I figured that 5 years was long enough to have nearly constant aching, not to mention the numbness and tingling, so I cracked and picked up the phone. My dad has problem with his shoulders too, and his chiropractor was able to offer him some relief, so off I went.
I love the body charts that they have you fill out at doctors offices. You know, the drawings of the back and front of the body, with a legend consisting of different symbols that represent an assortment of aches and pains. One is supposed to draw on the body diagram to pinpoint the areas which are having issues with the appropriate symbol. I seriously considered circling the whole body and then putting a giant X through it. I mean, really? Someone like me who has abused their bodies for 13+ years dancing? I have had issues with just about every part of my body.
I decided that the X through the diagram would not be presenting the best attitude, so I focused on the areas that have been giving me the most trouble lately. This perpetuated some very interesting events. Such as my foot being manipulated and cracked back into place. Yes, I did say my foot. I've had problems with that sucker for the better part of 10 years, with issues ranging from nerve damage to bone spurs to tendinitis. Not to mention a pretty nice sprain 2 years back. It seems that there's been a bone out of place. Or at least it was. She took that puppy on and it had no chance. CRACK!!! It shockingly didn't hurt (I feel that for how loud it cracked, I should have been melting to the floor in tears).
The most fun part of the visit was the work on my shoulder. By fun, I mean that she may as well have released a cageful of scorpions into the office and then locked me in. (okay, it really wasn't that bad) I have learned the Dr. Rimby's thumbs are registered as illegal weapons in 15 states. I had them digging into my ulnar nerve for 10 minutes. That was 5 days ago. And it still feels bruised. Ouch.
So, today was my second visit back. I still have all sorts of soreness and tingling and numbness. She cracked my wrist today, which was freaky but nearly as much as my foot *shudder*. She found the world's most massive knot under my left shoulder, which would be attributing to some of the numbness and shoulder pain. She had mercy on me, just for today, and kept her thumbs mostly away from it. I have 2 more appointments scheduled in the next week and something tells me that the weapons will be coming out of the holsters then.
I'll be sure to say my prayers before I arrive.
(PS- if anyone is looking for a chiropractor, I highly recommend Dr. Rimby! While her thumbs are very scary, she's amazing!)
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Sunday, March 29, 2009
The State of Are
I feel the need to write tonight. I have nothing profound to say. I am not climbing atop my refrigerator soapbox to spew about the injustices of the world. I'm not sad. I'm not particularly happy, either. I just am. Its that place of near nothingness where no spectacular, or even unspectacular, events have occurred. There is no excitement, no real joy, no sorrow, no depression. That place where you just.... are.
Its like the opposite of Neverland. In Neverland, you never grow old. You use your imagination to feed yourself brilliantly color mush that is neverendingly satisfying. There are faeries, and magic, and tick tocking crocodiles. There are sword fights with pirates and food fights with friends. In Neverland, there is constant action, adventure, danger, and amusement. There is always something. Some purpose. Some presence. Some meaning.
In this land, for which I have no name, everything has a grey tone. There is no color, no faerie dust, no green grass, no crocodiles. There is boredom, and lonesomeness, and dull aches. It is so... there... that it shall remain nameless because a proper noun attached to it would give it some meaning that is undeserved. Some presence. Some purpose.
I am not sad tonight. I am not depressed. I have no cause for happiness or delight. I just am. Its not a terrible place to be, I suppose. It is better than lying collapsed in a heap on the floor, sobbing from some terrible occurrence. It is more desirable than suffering with pain or sickness or grief. But, I am still longing for more. Longing for a purpose, for a reason to keep going, for some delight and joy and happiness. Really, I am waiting for my life to begin, and that is a depressing thought. At 26, my life should be well on its way. But, alas and alack, that is not the case. I suppose that I shall have to continue along this grey path until I can manage to break through the dull brush along the side and into a land where there is something. Some purpose. Some presence. Some meaning.
A place like Neverland.
Its like the opposite of Neverland. In Neverland, you never grow old. You use your imagination to feed yourself brilliantly color mush that is neverendingly satisfying. There are faeries, and magic, and tick tocking crocodiles. There are sword fights with pirates and food fights with friends. In Neverland, there is constant action, adventure, danger, and amusement. There is always something. Some purpose. Some presence. Some meaning.
In this land, for which I have no name, everything has a grey tone. There is no color, no faerie dust, no green grass, no crocodiles. There is boredom, and lonesomeness, and dull aches. It is so... there... that it shall remain nameless because a proper noun attached to it would give it some meaning that is undeserved. Some presence. Some purpose.
I am not sad tonight. I am not depressed. I have no cause for happiness or delight. I just am. Its not a terrible place to be, I suppose. It is better than lying collapsed in a heap on the floor, sobbing from some terrible occurrence. It is more desirable than suffering with pain or sickness or grief. But, I am still longing for more. Longing for a purpose, for a reason to keep going, for some delight and joy and happiness. Really, I am waiting for my life to begin, and that is a depressing thought. At 26, my life should be well on its way. But, alas and alack, that is not the case. I suppose that I shall have to continue along this grey path until I can manage to break through the dull brush along the side and into a land where there is something. Some purpose. Some presence. Some meaning.
A place like Neverland.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Soapbox Activist
For anyone who even remotely knows me, it should come as no shock that issues of social justice is a very large soapbox that I oft find myself climbing onto. I basically have "social justice" scratched on the front of said box with a permanent marker. Its that obvious when I'm about to get going on the topic. I have this recurring mental picture of myself climbing aboard this massive refrigerator box (my soapbox is that big) the instant I open my mouth and out comes this virtually unstoppable word vomit in projectile form that would do "The Exorcist" proud. How's that for a tasty mental picture for you?
I have had many conversations in recent weeks on the subject of human trafficking. Trafficking in persons is not something that is on the forefront of most people's minds in this day and age. Especially in America, it is very common to believe that slavery went rolling out after the Civil War ended well over a century ago. Admittedly, it isn't a topic that I had spent any considerable amount of brain power on. Poverty, social inequalities, gender discrimination.. sure. But human trafficking? Yes, I knew it was there, but I think I preferred to believe that it was as dead as Elvis and surely not working in such profitable circumstances as to be a true source of wealth and "business" around the world. It isn't a pleasant subject, not something that one wants to acknowledge, perhaps for fear of what it would do in upsetting one's perception of the world even further.
My recent piqued interest on the subject of human trafficking prompted me to go see the movie "Taken." I already wanted to see it, even before I knew how much it focused on trafficking, purely for the adrenaline aspect of it. When I discovered that its primary focus was on the sex slave trade, I basically wanted to jump in line immediately to view it. Mind you, this was not out of any sick sense of sadism. I am a firm believer that people need to know what's going on in the world, regardless of how uncomfortable it is and how it might impede on their personal sense of satisfaction in ignorance. I was very pleased to see that a mainstream movie was taking the leap into such a massive issue that is not much in the public eye in America.
The fact that the subject had made it to the forefront in a major motion picture encouraged me that perhaps these items of discomfort to the soul of humanity may have a chance of being brought to some form of justice, purely through awareness. If the world remains in ignorance on the real issues occurring, there is no hope of any change coming to light in the dreadful darkness of the realities that exist. I know of many people personally who would rather not know. I have heard a host of excuses as to why they wish to remain ignorant, but I do not understand the benefit of this, besides their own personal sense of comfort. I know that this may sound harsh, but we need to know. There are people around the world who are literally dying because of their circumstances. If the world turns its head because it makes them uncomfortable, more and more will pass away everyday.
I think that this act of knowing is even more important for the people of the Christian church. It is our duty as Christians to reach out to the lost, to feed the hungry, to protect those who cannot protect themselves. We are denying the very life of Jesus when we stand by and do nothing. I am not meaning this as an attack towards Christians, but more as an encouragement to open our eyes, take in the horrific scenes and stories around the world, and then act. In whatever way you can. Become an activist, even if it is only through prayer and spreading the word to others.
I am currently working my way, somewhat slowly, through the 2008 TIP (Trafficking in Persons) Report put out by our government. It is a compilation of statistics and strategies to prevent human trafficking and prosecute those responsible for enslaving other humans, whether it be for labor or sex. It is very enlightening on the subject matter, and I am sure to have information to share with you all once I have a chance to better wrap my brain around it....
I have had many conversations in recent weeks on the subject of human trafficking. Trafficking in persons is not something that is on the forefront of most people's minds in this day and age. Especially in America, it is very common to believe that slavery went rolling out after the Civil War ended well over a century ago. Admittedly, it isn't a topic that I had spent any considerable amount of brain power on. Poverty, social inequalities, gender discrimination.. sure. But human trafficking? Yes, I knew it was there, but I think I preferred to believe that it was as dead as Elvis and surely not working in such profitable circumstances as to be a true source of wealth and "business" around the world. It isn't a pleasant subject, not something that one wants to acknowledge, perhaps for fear of what it would do in upsetting one's perception of the world even further.
My recent piqued interest on the subject of human trafficking prompted me to go see the movie "Taken." I already wanted to see it, even before I knew how much it focused on trafficking, purely for the adrenaline aspect of it. When I discovered that its primary focus was on the sex slave trade, I basically wanted to jump in line immediately to view it. Mind you, this was not out of any sick sense of sadism. I am a firm believer that people need to know what's going on in the world, regardless of how uncomfortable it is and how it might impede on their personal sense of satisfaction in ignorance. I was very pleased to see that a mainstream movie was taking the leap into such a massive issue that is not much in the public eye in America.
The fact that the subject had made it to the forefront in a major motion picture encouraged me that perhaps these items of discomfort to the soul of humanity may have a chance of being brought to some form of justice, purely through awareness. If the world remains in ignorance on the real issues occurring, there is no hope of any change coming to light in the dreadful darkness of the realities that exist. I know of many people personally who would rather not know. I have heard a host of excuses as to why they wish to remain ignorant, but I do not understand the benefit of this, besides their own personal sense of comfort. I know that this may sound harsh, but we need to know. There are people around the world who are literally dying because of their circumstances. If the world turns its head because it makes them uncomfortable, more and more will pass away everyday.
I think that this act of knowing is even more important for the people of the Christian church. It is our duty as Christians to reach out to the lost, to feed the hungry, to protect those who cannot protect themselves. We are denying the very life of Jesus when we stand by and do nothing. I am not meaning this as an attack towards Christians, but more as an encouragement to open our eyes, take in the horrific scenes and stories around the world, and then act. In whatever way you can. Become an activist, even if it is only through prayer and spreading the word to others.
I am currently working my way, somewhat slowly, through the 2008 TIP (Trafficking in Persons) Report put out by our government. It is a compilation of statistics and strategies to prevent human trafficking and prosecute those responsible for enslaving other humans, whether it be for labor or sex. It is very enlightening on the subject matter, and I am sure to have information to share with you all once I have a chance to better wrap my brain around it....
