Sunday, December 21, 2008

At a Loss for Words....

There are days, weekends, weeks, months, that remind you how fragile life is. How your existence, your mind, your emotions, your soul, can be snatched away in an instant, with no warning. I have known four separate people who have lost someone close to them within the last 3 weeks. It is just unimaginable, especially during a season where life and family are celebrated. It just doesn't seem right. There is an almost unethical sense to it, that it shouldn't be allowed to happen during this time. Its just... wrong.

I have personally never lost anyone close to me. At least not to death. Because of that, I can't necessarily relate to people who are grieving the loss of a loved one. I don't know what to say, how to help them cope, how to make it better. I have this thing where I always need to make things better. Times like this make my heart bleed, because how can you make this better? How can you take away some of the pain, or even provide a salve? You can't. You can only be a shoulder to cry on, a listening ear. Not that those are small things, but they don't fix anything. There is no magic cure.

I thank God that my babies are healthy. I thank God that their organs are working and that their body isn't fighting against them. I thank God that my family and friends are vibrant in life, that their hearts and livers and brains and all their other important organs are functioning fully. But I pray, and my heart goes out to those who are suffering, those who know loss on a more intimate level than anyone should. I won't give you the pat, Sunday school answers about how "everything happens for a reason" and "one day, all of this will make sense." I will just listen and love and be a shoulder.

And I will pray.


Rach said...

Your heart and your friendship and love for your friends, family and most of all Lord provides that salve.

You are a wonderful and beautiful soul, Bethany.

Mama Janna said...

This is pretty much how I felt, I have since had the greatest desire to squeeze my babies and make sure they are alright holding them close and kissing them.