Apparently you now need to be "of age" to purchase cold medicine. Yes, I know. This is truly absurd. I discovered this gem of insight last week, while practically dying of sickness, what with a cold and all. I had spent the day at home, working from the comfort of my couch. A quick trip into the office passed me by the local grocery store, which I decided to pay a visit in search of tissues and something to stop the coughing and constant drippage of my nasal passages.
After managing to infect a few aisles with my germs, I headed to the self checkout since I only had a few purchases to make and I wouldn't have to wait in line. I was minding my own business, carefully scanning each item. When I came to the cold medicine, however, something very odd and off putting happened. The machine started talking to me. It sounded something like this... "PLeaSe shOW tHE CAshIer yOUr IdenTIfiCAtion." (they do tend to emphasize the most akward parts of a word... Why is that?)
I must have stood there for about 30 seconds, sheerly stupified by the request. "Show the cashier my ID? For what? Its Tylenol Cold!" I thought to myself. I stole a few glances at the box in my hand to make sure that they hadn't legalized crack cocaine over the weekend and started selling it in your friendly neighborhood store without my knowledge. No matter how many times I looked at the box, it continued to say "Tylenol Cold". I apparently had not missed any major changes to the legality of street drugs.
In my utter confusion, I finally decided that it may be a good idea to turn my puzzled look over towards the cashier (who I could tell was not so happy at missing her afternoon soap opera). She then mumbled the same strange words..... "Can I see your ID?" I must have looked at her as if she had just asked me to produce an elephant out of my behind or something. It took me a full 15 seconds to recover myself enough to fumble around in my purse for my driver's license.
This experience would definitely classify as one of my most awkward and strange trips to the grocery store. It seems that the youth and druggies of the world must have come up with a way to make meth out of antihistimine. Who knows. Its all just strange. Very, very strange.
Showing posts with label cold. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cold. Show all posts
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Snow/ or The White Flakes of Death
Snow. I don't recall ever really liking it. Maybe for a winter or two between the ages of 8 and 10. But that is hardly significant enough to mention. There may have been some fun days of sledding back then, and I have distinct memories of digging tunnels through the quite high plowed snow in the lot next to our house (and, okay, that was pretty cool). But even with those few memories of joy amidst the white, powdery stuff, I mostly recall one thing: the cold.
Snow is really very cold. I suppose it has something to do with its being frozen and all. I don't like cold. At all. I find cold to be one of the most disagreeable things on earth, along with ingrown toenails and straight tequila. Cold is just not nice. Not only is snow cold, but its everywhere. I may not mind it so much if when it snowed, it just came down in specific patches so that not everything was completely drown in cold whiteness.
Along with getting everywhere else, it gets on my car. And around my car. Which requires me to brush off my vehicle and sometimes even shovel it out. Which requires me to be in the snow, and even get some on me. And then sometimes you're so stuck in your parking spot that you can't even get out of it without being rescued by some random guy that happened to be visiting a neighbor down the street (remember that, Becca?!). Then the roads become a disaster, all slushy and sloppy. Then, to make it all worse, it melts a little and then refreezes. This turns surfaces into ice skating rinks and then you get stuck and can't go anywhere. And I mean all surfaces, including my wooden front steps, which causes me to almost slip and fall and break something. Are we having fun yet?
I was recently told that I am now required to not hate snow, what with my having a niece and nephew and all. Apparently, children are brainwashed into liking snow. I don't understand that. Are they given visions of it in the womb and told that its fun to play in? Seriously! I can't think of any other explanation. I do refuse to like snow, though, and while I may be occasionally forced to make snowmen and snow angels and perhaps go sledding... but I will not succumb. I will not like it.
Tomorrow is promising to have the first real "weather" of the winter. I never understood why people call winter storms by the single word "weather." "We're going to have weather." When snow is described like that, its basically guaranteed to be bad. I'm not at all excited about the "weather". Or the snow. Or the ice. Its just not fun for me. The only good thing is that I may leave work early and finish my day out at home. I suppose that I shall have to make the best of it with working in my sweats while drinking tea and singing Christmas carols at the top of my lungs. Perhaps it will be a good day after all.
Snow is really very cold. I suppose it has something to do with its being frozen and all. I don't like cold. At all. I find cold to be one of the most disagreeable things on earth, along with ingrown toenails and straight tequila. Cold is just not nice. Not only is snow cold, but its everywhere. I may not mind it so much if when it snowed, it just came down in specific patches so that not everything was completely drown in cold whiteness.
Along with getting everywhere else, it gets on my car. And around my car. Which requires me to brush off my vehicle and sometimes even shovel it out. Which requires me to be in the snow, and even get some on me. And then sometimes you're so stuck in your parking spot that you can't even get out of it without being rescued by some random guy that happened to be visiting a neighbor down the street (remember that, Becca?!). Then the roads become a disaster, all slushy and sloppy. Then, to make it all worse, it melts a little and then refreezes. This turns surfaces into ice skating rinks and then you get stuck and can't go anywhere. And I mean all surfaces, including my wooden front steps, which causes me to almost slip and fall and break something. Are we having fun yet?
I was recently told that I am now required to not hate snow, what with my having a niece and nephew and all. Apparently, children are brainwashed into liking snow. I don't understand that. Are they given visions of it in the womb and told that its fun to play in? Seriously! I can't think of any other explanation. I do refuse to like snow, though, and while I may be occasionally forced to make snowmen and snow angels and perhaps go sledding... but I will not succumb. I will not like it.
Tomorrow is promising to have the first real "weather" of the winter. I never understood why people call winter storms by the single word "weather." "We're going to have weather." When snow is described like that, its basically guaranteed to be bad. I'm not at all excited about the "weather". Or the snow. Or the ice. Its just not fun for me. The only good thing is that I may leave work early and finish my day out at home. I suppose that I shall have to make the best of it with working in my sweats while drinking tea and singing Christmas carols at the top of my lungs. Perhaps it will be a good day after all.
